Friday, March 4, 2011

Conversations from the Subway

First, I got the new iPhone and LOVE it. I'm one of "those people" now and am amazed by how much it can actually do. I'm still getting the gist of it but if you have any recommended Apps, send them my way.

Now, because I have the new iPhone, I was able to scribe, in verbatim, the entire experience that happened to me in the subway today. This event, though funny, sad and strange, has inspired me to write a weekly blog post titled, "Conversations from the Subway." Some of the things I hear each day are just too good to not share.

So without further adieu, here's today's:

The subway doors open. I walk inside checking my surroundings and for any empty seats. I sit down, pull out my book and look to my right. A rather large lady (if you can call her that) is screaming at her three year old girl (named Diane).

Large Lady: "Come on and sit yourself down, now!"

Me: Eye rolls

A couple stops pass by and I quickly look up from my book at the commotion going on in front of me. The father (Darrell, as they called him) is holding his three year old up and removing her pants so she could use the bathroom.

Me: [thinking] What the??

Large Lady: Squat Diane!! If yous gonna pull her pants down Darrell, make sure she she squats or she gonna just pee all over herself.

Me: [thinking] OH MY GOD! That woman just told her daughter to pee in the subway!? What happens when she gets older?

Large Lady: Come on, just pee Diane. Get it over wit!

I had to tell myself to close my mouth after the Large Lady looked at me with eyes like, "You better not say anything." I glanced around the car to see if anyone else was astonished, but saw nothing. Another subway rider even got up and proceeded to help Darrell hold Diane up. I mean??

Darrell: Ahh snap! We just missed our stop cause she was going to the bathroom.

Large Lady: Oh Darrell, we just aint right!

Me: [thinking] Yeah no kidding.

We pulled into 42nd street and the doors open.

Large Lady: Come the [flip] on Darrell and Diane. Man you slow.

Me: [thinking] Oh gosh. Poor Diane.


  1. Poor Diane and poor MEREDITH!! Just add it to the list of all of the bizarre things I'm sure you've witnessed in the big city!

  2. something you must see to believe. OMG.

  3. Ugh, I've witnessed stuff like that more times than I care to count. That's NYC for you!